Crackhead. If I had to pinpoint the one reason we never went out in high school, it was Crackhead. How could I misinterpret the signs of her being with him versus not?
This discussion has come up more times than I care to count, and it's always something of an amusing topic, since I was so totally off on their relationship. The weird thing is that retrospectively, it didn't seem that I was so far off, and yet, I may have placed too much stock in the high school relationship as well. My presumption was that once a couple was a couple, they were exclusive till it was over. Apparently, I was mistaken.
The Arizona trip had a ton of different activities, and granted, most of her time was spent with me, and yet when we were walking about during one activity we did on the Arizona trip, she wondered multiple times where "Peter" was. I honestly can't remember the name of this place, though I wish I could. It was like an Old Western town which featured some kind of baked bean barbeque that was kind of mediocre. Clearly, the food wasn't the point of being there. It wasn't exactly an amusement park, but I do remember paying tic-tac-toe against a chicken.
To clarify, she insists that she called everyone "Peter" in that time. No, his name wasn't Peter, nor was anyone else's. But I always associated the name with him, since I heard it in reference to him at one point, and what else was I to think? I didn't know their games. Besides, isn't having a pet name of some kind a sign of a relationship? So I thought.
Fast forward to a time when I was hanging out in her room with BG, Rox, and another guy I'll call The Swede. The Swede did some vital work with me and another guy later on that yer in relation to music, but that's another story entirely. Point is, he was there too, and I'll tell the amusing tidbit that goes along with that in a moment. Where this slice fits into this tale is how Crackhead acted with The Queen. When they were together in her room, he was all over her, and she didn't appear to be overly offended by the attention he gave.
What I saw was the kind of relationships I'd been missing out on, and anyone that close would not be interested in going elsewhere. There didn't seem to be any animosity to indicate that they weren't close. So at some point I left the room. As luck would have it, everyone else got kicked out soon thereafter...well, almost everyone. Turns out at some point the Swede went to sleep in the hide-a-bed which was in their room. Let's make that clear: he was actuall INSIDE the hide-a-bed, so that some time later when everyone was ready for bed, he emerges and wonder what happened. I'm not 100% on the timeframe there, but I heard about it quite a bit.
This Arizona trip covered from the day after Christmas to the day after New Year's Day, so we got to celebrate New Year's with all our band friends at a building there in Arizona. Everyone was moderately dressed up, and since BG wanted to ride with Rox over there, The Queen went ahead with the trade and rode on Bus One with me. It was my impression that she wasn't happy with the switch (but I've been wrong about a great many things).
Well, we got to the New Year's Eve Party, and I walked in with her and BG and Rox. Wasn't sure how the night would go, but I was with her, so I figured it might be a decent evening. Then, she saw him. He was playing pool with his buddies, and when she saw him, she ran to him. What was I to think? I went elsewhere. I was on my own all night since I didn't want to see her with him. The more time I had spent with her, the more it tortured me to see her (apparently) happy with someone else.
Turns out that she spent all of 30 minutes with him, and had I just hung around, I would have spent time with her again minus Crackhead, who was far more interested in his buddies than her. So I blew it.
The trip home went very much like the trip up. Everyone was on their respective buses, and we had two stops I'll make note of. One was a place called Old Tucson that has been used for movie making and such. It's a bit of an amusement park but focuses more on the old western looking town that it is, though it is more of a movie set. I was priviledged here to spend the whole time with her (a point she brings up fairly often when I complain about Crackhead), and we had a good time.
This was overshadowed by another time at an Elk's Lodge for dinner. I was sitting on one side of her; guess who had the other. For me, it served to derail the hopefulness I felt after Old Tucson because it seemed like despite all the time I had spent with her, she was still going out with him. Absolutely maddening, and I was too young to know what to do.
So crash and burn city on that trip, right? Not entirely. She did notice me which was a little encouraging even though she seemed more hooked on him. And while the next few weeks after the trip were of no account, we were chosen to represent Oklahoma in the Presential Inauguration Parade for Bill Clinton. This time, I made sure to get on the same bus as she, and so began round two.
The trouble, again, rested with Crackhead (aka Ali Ababwa), but in retrospect, it shouldn't have. She spent most of her time with me. If I had been the least bit agressive, things would have been different, but I wasn't. I have the excuse of being young, but still... If only...
Friday, January 18, 2008
Thursday, January 17, 2008
It All Began in High School
Isn't that where all life began? Are not all the worlds only graduation caps that got stuck? Ok, so that's a little silly, but despite its utopian environment, life began the senior year of high school. It's when most people start making the big decisions for real rather than just dreaming about them. It's the time when you know you'll be an adult the following year and somewhere possibly far away from home. It's where life begins to lay itself out and everything you do affects everything from then on.
Seniors in high school don't realize this at all. Only after you become an adult in your 30's do you look to try and figure out where all this mess really started and you come up with high school. If only you'd done this or that back then, then things would have been different.
For me and The Queen, that's also where it all started. It's been almost fifteen years snce graduation, and truth be told, I'd heard her name as far back as sixth grade since we were both in band and in the same middle school (that would be sixth thru eighth grade). But it wasn't until we were halfway through our senior until I actually noticed her. And did I take notice!
What was it? I can't put my finger on it no matter how hard I try. She has a beautiful face, a very cheerful attitude, an awesome smile, a laugh to die for, and after I got to know her, her personality is incredible and her heart was so open that I can't help but wonder if she was just taking pity on me at the time (I was a bit pathetic). But once you start to talk to her, you find an intelligence that she works hard to hide, and beyond the hot body, I found that extremely attractive. It is a rare person that can keep up with me with I'm talking or theorizing, but she did it without any problem and continues to do so to this day. I've lost many people in my conversations, but I've never lost her (unless I'm just going off on tangents, which isn't her fault).
Anyway... back to the tale.
The Broken Arrow Pride was preparing to take a trip to Tempe, Arizona for the Fiesta Bowl Pageant of Bands and parade. At the time, I was completely obsessed with riding on the first bus. Something about always being first in line, I guess. Well, My friend at the time, a junior we'll call BG, wanted to get on the sixth bus to be with his latest flame, Rox. Now Rox was a friend of The Queen, so it was The Queen who let us know while we were signing up for a bus what they were on.
I insisted on being on one, so BG complied, even though he wanted to hang with Rox on six. He was always great that way, but he moped the whole time. Oh well.
The trip came and the bus ride to Tempe was all but uneventful in regards to The Queen and I. She had her entourage of friends and I had...well... I had associates more than I had friends. You have to understand what an introvert I was then and am now. It gets me into trouble because I don't talk to anyone. It makes The Queen crazy because I get very reclusive so very often.
When did I take notice? I can't really pinpoint it. I believe in the early part of the trip, BG was spending a lot of time in Rox's room, so I noticed The Queen. She was sweet; she was cute; and I just wanted to spend time with her. When BG began spending almost 100% of his time with Rox, The Queen had nothing better to do but to hang with others, and I got to the point where I was tagging along behind BG just to spend time with The Queen. Hence, almost 100% of her time was spent with me. I had no complaints.
It actually annoyed the crap out of BG at the time, but when I spoke to him some years later after the Queen and I were married, he had noticed that I seemed to like her. The Queen insists my bit that I liked her in high school was just a pick up line some four years later, but I promise it was true. It really was...
But that's how it started. She was fun to be with, and I was remarkably comfortable around her. Note that at that point in my life, I was the consummate geek. I had never so much as kissed a girl at that point and the closest I'd gotten to a relationship was two years before that also on the AZ trip, and she was a senior. But we had only spent time together. Hugs but no kisses.
What stood in the way? According to the Queen, absolutely nothing. She maintains to this day that if I had asked at the time, we might have ended up together right out of high school. I, on the other hand, saw an obstacle. And we'll call him what I call him to this day. He is not a druggie, but just a play on his name: Crackhead.
Seniors in high school don't realize this at all. Only after you become an adult in your 30's do you look to try and figure out where all this mess really started and you come up with high school. If only you'd done this or that back then, then things would have been different.
For me and The Queen, that's also where it all started. It's been almost fifteen years snce graduation, and truth be told, I'd heard her name as far back as sixth grade since we were both in band and in the same middle school (that would be sixth thru eighth grade). But it wasn't until we were halfway through our senior until I actually noticed her. And did I take notice!
What was it? I can't put my finger on it no matter how hard I try. She has a beautiful face, a very cheerful attitude, an awesome smile, a laugh to die for, and after I got to know her, her personality is incredible and her heart was so open that I can't help but wonder if she was just taking pity on me at the time (I was a bit pathetic). But once you start to talk to her, you find an intelligence that she works hard to hide, and beyond the hot body, I found that extremely attractive. It is a rare person that can keep up with me with I'm talking or theorizing, but she did it without any problem and continues to do so to this day. I've lost many people in my conversations, but I've never lost her (unless I'm just going off on tangents, which isn't her fault).
Anyway... back to the tale.
The Broken Arrow Pride was preparing to take a trip to Tempe, Arizona for the Fiesta Bowl Pageant of Bands and parade. At the time, I was completely obsessed with riding on the first bus. Something about always being first in line, I guess. Well, My friend at the time, a junior we'll call BG, wanted to get on the sixth bus to be with his latest flame, Rox. Now Rox was a friend of The Queen, so it was The Queen who let us know while we were signing up for a bus what they were on.
I insisted on being on one, so BG complied, even though he wanted to hang with Rox on six. He was always great that way, but he moped the whole time. Oh well.
The trip came and the bus ride to Tempe was all but uneventful in regards to The Queen and I. She had her entourage of friends and I had...well... I had associates more than I had friends. You have to understand what an introvert I was then and am now. It gets me into trouble because I don't talk to anyone. It makes The Queen crazy because I get very reclusive so very often.
When did I take notice? I can't really pinpoint it. I believe in the early part of the trip, BG was spending a lot of time in Rox's room, so I noticed The Queen. She was sweet; she was cute; and I just wanted to spend time with her. When BG began spending almost 100% of his time with Rox, The Queen had nothing better to do but to hang with others, and I got to the point where I was tagging along behind BG just to spend time with The Queen. Hence, almost 100% of her time was spent with me. I had no complaints.
It actually annoyed the crap out of BG at the time, but when I spoke to him some years later after the Queen and I were married, he had noticed that I seemed to like her. The Queen insists my bit that I liked her in high school was just a pick up line some four years later, but I promise it was true. It really was...
But that's how it started. She was fun to be with, and I was remarkably comfortable around her. Note that at that point in my life, I was the consummate geek. I had never so much as kissed a girl at that point and the closest I'd gotten to a relationship was two years before that also on the AZ trip, and she was a senior. But we had only spent time together. Hugs but no kisses.
What stood in the way? According to the Queen, absolutely nothing. She maintains to this day that if I had asked at the time, we might have ended up together right out of high school. I, on the other hand, saw an obstacle. And we'll call him what I call him to this day. He is not a druggie, but just a play on his name: Crackhead.
Prologue
Hi there. I'm a geek. Now, you've probably already conjured an image of a twirp living in momma's basement, wearing taped glasses, and pants pulled up to his armpits. That would be the stereotype that I really don't fit. However, I enjoy digging into computers, I love video games, I understand software easily, and am grabbed by technolust at the drop of the next paper thin laptop (mmm, Mac Air...).
I am not rich by any means, and use my phone as an iPod. In fact, I'm listening to a playlist right now that I saved to the gigabyte card I popped in it within hours of purchasing. Not only that, but I have a couple shows saved on there too. Yup, I watch movies on my cell phone. But before you think I have the next best thing in phones, let me clarify that my phone is a Motorola Razr. Ah, yes. Not a phone known for its multimedia capabilities, but in the hands of a capable geek, a powerhouse of movie and music.
That's me, though. Geek is not an insult, but a fact. Thinkgeek.com has the most awesome toys known to man. I write websites and make a living troubleshooting a bit of software used by hospitals to file insurance claims electronically. But here's where the semi-sterotype ends. Why is that?
This geek is married to the Queen of the Universe. He also has three daughters, lives on his own with his family, and carries his 5'10" frame at a moderate 210 pounds. Not overweight; not skinny, and no pocket protectors. I also regularly play bass or drums in the church band, though I will likely start guitar soon, since our guitar player left and someone else in the church can play bass and we have a semi-regular drummer (he's the pastor's son, but his wife is the worship leader at another church -- go figure). I also enjoy writing screenplays among other things, and love, love, love movies.
But this blog is about life. My life with The Queen of the Universe and the girls: Rock Girl, who is gifted in the upper 1% of her grade level and reading at a mid-6th grade level in the third grade and enjoys playing her own guitar and chess; The Socialite who is so much like her mother that she prefers to chat in kindergarden than do well on her benchmark tests; and Sassy Pants who is three and has an attitude to match the name. When she gets older, maybe the name will change, but that's her best descripter for the moment.
But a life is before and after the present. It started somewhere, but it always moves forward. So accordingly, this story will deal with the past and the present. About how the Geek landed himself the Queen of the Universe and became the sole male in a house of women. Yeah, I've heard the jokes...
In about ten years, they say I'll be considering a secret place in the mountains where no one can find me...
I am not rich by any means, and use my phone as an iPod. In fact, I'm listening to a playlist right now that I saved to the gigabyte card I popped in it within hours of purchasing. Not only that, but I have a couple shows saved on there too. Yup, I watch movies on my cell phone. But before you think I have the next best thing in phones, let me clarify that my phone is a Motorola Razr. Ah, yes. Not a phone known for its multimedia capabilities, but in the hands of a capable geek, a powerhouse of movie and music.
That's me, though. Geek is not an insult, but a fact. Thinkgeek.com has the most awesome toys known to man. I write websites and make a living troubleshooting a bit of software used by hospitals to file insurance claims electronically. But here's where the semi-sterotype ends. Why is that?
This geek is married to the Queen of the Universe. He also has three daughters, lives on his own with his family, and carries his 5'10" frame at a moderate 210 pounds. Not overweight; not skinny, and no pocket protectors. I also regularly play bass or drums in the church band, though I will likely start guitar soon, since our guitar player left and someone else in the church can play bass and we have a semi-regular drummer (he's the pastor's son, but his wife is the worship leader at another church -- go figure). I also enjoy writing screenplays among other things, and love, love, love movies.
But this blog is about life. My life with The Queen of the Universe and the girls: Rock Girl, who is gifted in the upper 1% of her grade level and reading at a mid-6th grade level in the third grade and enjoys playing her own guitar and chess; The Socialite who is so much like her mother that she prefers to chat in kindergarden than do well on her benchmark tests; and Sassy Pants who is three and has an attitude to match the name. When she gets older, maybe the name will change, but that's her best descripter for the moment.
But a life is before and after the present. It started somewhere, but it always moves forward. So accordingly, this story will deal with the past and the present. About how the Geek landed himself the Queen of the Universe and became the sole male in a house of women. Yeah, I've heard the jokes...
In about ten years, they say I'll be considering a secret place in the mountains where no one can find me...
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