The Church Dilemma

There are some decisions in life that are very difficult to make, and one such decision has to do with where you choose to worship. In Oklahoma, there are hundreds upon hundreds of churches. I counted the different denominational variations in the Tulsa yellow pages once, and came up with nearly 80, so choice isn't an issue; it's finding a good fit for you and your family.

Several years ago, we settled into a church in Broken Arrow that we felt fit us fairly well. The people were very nice and welcoming. They had a lively bunch of children of different ages, and the congregation appeared to be doing fine. They were small, but had a lot of heart. We found them through the Angel Food program we were doing at the time, and that church was an outlet for it. I had to dig to find the service times, but when I did, we went, and we stayed.

Lately, things have changed. Throughout the summer, the Princesses were the only children in children's church. The congregation numbers had been dwindling here and there, and apparently this dwindling had taken the children with them. This was a problem, since as kids get older, the need for a peer group that is sharing their problems becomes greater meaning that we found ourselves forced to find somewhere with a solid child populace so our children could have a peer group that shares their faith, as opposed to the rather atheistic school system that wants to share everything else.

Over the summer, Moneypenny had invited the Princesses to atten Vacation Bible School at their church. It was something the Princesses could get involved with in regards to a church, and we knew someone there, so we thought it would be a good. All three of them could go, giving the Queen and I some quiet time together. I believe I talked about this before.

Anyway, now several weeks later, our minds return to that time, and feel that such a child populace would be better for our kids than where we were where they didn't even want to go to children's church since they were the only ones back there. It was especially hard for me, since I enjoyed playing in the praise band having had the opportunity to learn and play bass, drums, guitar, and even use my existing piano skills. Sure there were complications sometimes, but overall, it was a good experience, so leaving was very hard for me. We go from being someone to being just another face in a bigger church than we're leaving. It was also hard to know that when they're dwindling already, we served to contribute to that dwindlation.

I offered some thoughts to our pastor on why I thought we weren't seeing some of the logical flux a church usually sees where people come and go. Well, we had more going than coming, and I felt that one contributor might be that the service times aren't listed anywhere either on the inside or outside of the building. Hence, someone zipping by on the moderately travelled road that runs past it won't think twice about going since they don't know when service begins. It made me feel good when the last time the Queen went by there she saw they've put something out front to display the times.

We don't dislike anyone there, and if they still had peers for the Princesses, we wouldn't have left. The Queen said she spent a tearful moment with our Pastor there, and we continue to maintain the website (at no charge). We actually liked the small, intimate setting it's turning into. But life is about the people around you that matter the most, and for their sake, we turned to Moneypenny's church, which we are currently trying to adjust to. They are in no need of anyone in their praise band and over the last couple weeks, it appears they trade out people, so maybe there's hope. Time will tell.

For now, we are faces in the crowd. Not used to that, but I've got something else cooking, so the lack of commitment there may be good for the moment.