Fort Carson

I lived in Colorado. Colorado Springs, to be exact. Fort Carson is like a suburb of the city sitting right on the South end of town, but it emptied right onto your choice of the two roads that basically took you on either side of Colorado Springs: Academy Blvd on one side and Nevada Ave on the other. No, these aren't the outermost streets, but they join at both ends of the city so staying on one is like riding an artery -- where ever you're going, you'll get close with one or the other.

After my 6 month stint at the School of Music, I passed my final audition to graduate and move on to my permanent duty station at Fort Carson. I had very little to do once I arrived because the actual job was very, very easy. Show at 8 on most mornings, play a few gigs here and there, and get off between 3 and 4:30. Depending on what all was going on, there were days we came in later, some earlier, and some not at all. What's a guy to do in a town with no family and no friends?

I watched movies. Possibly this started my obsession that later grew into writing, but the base had a movie theatre that was $1 to watch a different movie every night. So, every night, I walked the mile from the barracks to the theatre and watched a movie. I saw some very good movies that had a reasonably sized audience, some like Cabin Boy which had an audience of maybe 5, and only one like House Party 3, which filled the theatre to the breaking point, standing room only (and I was one of maybe four or five white people -- not racist, mind you, that was just an observation).

It wasn't too long before my sponser, The Burgurmeister, took me to one of the car dealerships (from whom he had bought all his vehicles and trusted) to help me get a car. We went several times, as I was rather indecisive, until I finally just said I'd take something with two doors (after he'd tried to put me in a baby blue 4 door Escort that I hated). He came up with a 3 door hatchback Subaru Justy that was red. I didn't much care for red, but they said to start with this car and in a couple years, I could trade up for something better. Sounded good to me.

So I moved from walking to the movie theatre every day to driving all around town. I went everywhere and discovered the town in its entirety. There was even a day it snowed and ice was everywhere, but I decided to go out anyway. I drove all around town, slipping and sliding and learning how to drive on the snow and ice. The streets were quite deserted, so I was saved from much trouble as I slid all over.

However, I also had my first little car accident. While coming back on the base, I was following behind another new vehicle and the ice got the better of me. I slid right into the back of them, denting my hood, and busting my headlight. The vehicle I hit was a jeep-like vehicle with a dealer tag. I slightly bent his spare tire holder rim. I was going slow anyway, and may have hit at 5-10 mph at the most, so damage was minmal, and I never heard any more of it. Of course, I paid through the nose to replace my foreign headlight.

After a couple months of this, more people came in from the SOM, and one of them was a guy who was very, very good at the military thing. He kept his hair trimmed, his PT scores up, and even went to the training for NCO, and was a corporal prior to my leaving the Army. The Army term for someone who does the Army well is High Speed, so that's what we'll call him. We hung out together throughout most of my time in the Army, and went all over the place.

He was very much into Transformers (not unlike my current friend, Optimus Prime), and hunting for these toys was a pasttime we enjoyed, even making a trip to Denver to check out their Toys R Us up there. Another thing we did was visit every single McDonald's in Colorado Springs at the time. We liked to eat in a variety of places, and after hitting a few of the local McDonald's we saw a map in one that showed all of the local stores: the quest was born.

What was the job all about? Well, we played mostly pass-in-reviews for high ranking individuals incoming and outgoing. We saw more brass in the form of colonels and generals than most Army soldiers do thanks to what we do in playing those wonderful marches. We marched parades for local and surrounding communities and other bases; we played sit down concerts every where from Pueblo to Denver and beyond to Utah, Wyoming and Nebraska; I was in the jazz ensemble, a dixie band, and a brass quintet, and we were all over the state to venues some people would never have even heard of. I was only there for a year and a half, but I figure I played some 500 performances with the band, as there were time we played 2 or 3 gigs in a day.

And when it comes to gigs we took, sometimes we would give preference with a positive answer to one question: are you serving food? We got fed at multiple places with some very good chow and some that really left a lot to be desired. Being in a group that performed so extensively and so very well was a job experience I will never forget as long as I live. I loved every minute....of the band part.

The Army part was not my cup of tea. I hated PT. Hated it with a passion. If I could get out of running outside, I would, and after some time, one of the women did aerobics inside and we could do that instead of running (sometimes). I took every opportunity. This was one of those things, however, that got me into trouble because I would avoid running to such an extent, that I eventually got caught, and written up for it.

You see, what I know now that I didn't know then was that the Army Band was a total cake walk. Do what you're told and you'll be fine. I was lazy in a lot of regards which made me a target for the First Sergeant and Chief Warrant Officer of the band. But that wasn't my only folly with them...or more specifically, the Chief. You see, he was a trombone player like I was. He was a very good one that played with the best band in the Army, and when he was there, he had played a particular solo called the Blue Bells of Scotland. It's a difficult trombone solo, but I enjoyed playing it. I played it for my incoming audition...oh, bad idea.

Since the Chief knew this solo for more years than I'd played the instrument, he knew every nuance and every pitfall it had. He graded me harded than I'd ever been graded, and as a result, I failed the audition coming into the band. They wanted me to re-audition at a later date after practicing with the Burgurmeister. I was in shock. I thought the auditions were over and all they wanted to do was hear me play.

That incident along with my own lazy negligence served to kill me for the military. If only's abound with abundance out of that experience, but the band and military weren't the only experiences I gained. No, I managed to garner me 2 girlfriends out of the deal as well. One was short lived, but the other lingered for quite some time, even though we barely saw each other.